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Roots – Uncovering a New World

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Roots are a part of anything that grows. To encourage strong growth above ground, one must attend to the roots. Good soil allows roots to move freely, take hold, and absorb all the benefits available. An event last year encouraged me to dig deeper and uncover unknown facts about roots. Not just any roots, but MY ROOTS.

Denise’s Roots

In late September of 2022, I embarked on an adventure with a dear friend, Denise. Our destination was Sorbo San Basile. Denise’s ancestral roots grew and remain in this cute little town. It was quite the excursion and Italy was simply beautiful. This trip was meaningful to her and it was an eye-opener for me. I learned a lot about how significant it was to connect with your roots. What I did not realize was the impact of this journey on my life.

Imagine having records of your ancestral journey. Going to the home where your ancestors lived, in a town where the current residents knew the family name. Joy filled the air with excitement, as Denise shared photos and names from the past. The family name was a recognizable one and each person asked questions as best they could – even with a language barrier. The residents of this beautiful small town were excited that this American came to connect with her roots.

Walking through the town, down the hilly neighborhoods, we attempted to avoid cars that barely squeezed through the narrow streets. The scenery was amazing, the views breathtaking, and talk quickly spread through the town of the American and her friend who came to visit. One lady rushed over to take a look and chat. After a bit of conversation and sharing of pictures, Denise realized this woman was a cousin. Joy was shared through tears and smiles. It brings me joy to have witnessed this act of connecting with one’s roots and homeland.

There were many other beautiful adventures on this trip, from the gardens, the foodie adventures, lounging in Ischia, and the shopping in Positano. I made cantaloupe gelato, hand-thrown pizza, and amazing lunch options. We even made it to Pompeii, which was a dream come true for me. I remembered telling my parents that I wanted to visit Pompeii and participate in an archeological dig. Participating in an archeological dig has not happened. This is a dream, in the queue to become a reality. I must say, simply seeing the remnants of Pompeii was quite the experience. Amid all the beauty and history, a feeling that I cannot describe evolved into a directive. I needed to uncover more of my roots.

My Roots

The urge to discover your ancestral roots allows so many emotions to come into play. Some people have documentation, family photos, records, and in some cases verbal validation of family history. Elders who want to talk and share, have been recorded or handwritten notes document stories of the past. It is in these stories my yearning to know my roots became my priority. I needed to know my maternal roots.

My brother was my guinea pig for the Ancestry test. We sent in a sample of his saliva. Once the results have been documented, Ancestry sends the results. This was great and what a melting pot my gene pool is on my paternal side. This left me wondering about my maternal genes. Didn’t that gene pool matter? It mattered to me.

In the early days of its existence, African Ancestry began advertising and I knew that one day, I would submit my DNA. This has been a dream of mine since I was a teenager. Knowing what tribe I could say my lineage was from has always been important. The opportunity to find out my maternal roots was about to become a reality. I have always been curious – which drove my parents nuts! I ordered the testing kit and didn’t tell anyone. It was my secret gift to myself.

The kit came with three swabs. My daughters participated in this mission of discovery by swabbing my mouth. It was important to me for them to be a part of this ever-important task. I performed the final swabbing. Registering my kit and then mailing it was quite an emotional experience. Once the kit had been mailed, more questions popped into my head. What if the result were inconclusive? Did I do the swabbing correctly? Would the swabs provide enough DNA? Would it get lost in the mail?

The first email came notifying me that it had been received. A few weeks later another notice came stating the results were in. This is where things get strange. The test I requested was from my maternal side of my ancestry. The results arrived via email on my Mother’s Birthday. Perhaps this was a gift from my mom. or simply a coincidence. I notified my daughters the results were in before I opened the email. Was I finally going to embrace more of my roots?

My hands shook as I moved my mouse to open the email. Through my tears, a new truth unfolded. My love for agriculture and working with my hands was a part of who I am.

I am 99.7% of Temne descent via my maternal lineage. According to research, in the 15th century, the Temne people migrated from Guinea and settled in Northern Sierra Leone. Understanding my connection to this earth has truly made me happy. It seems the Temne people were known to be connected to the land. Traditionally they grew rice, cassava, millet, and kola nut. They also grew and traded peanuts and tobacco. I have so much to discover about the Temne people who proved to be survivors and knew how to work the land. The Temne are known to have been excellent farmers.

Knowing a little bit about both sides of my gene pool has made me even more proud of my sharecropping roots. Knowing that most likely, finding the village my people are from may never happen, is real. However, knowing some of the cultural aspects of my ancestors means the world to me.

I must say, I look at my test results almost daily and smile through my tears of joy. Roots matter. Knowing more about the history of your family matters. When I think about it, no matter what trials and tribulations my ancestors went through, our roots are still here.

I cannot wait to explore more about the Temne people, Sierra Leone, and just maybe find more relatives. Perhaps they will be Elders with good memories, who are willing to share. Visiting a place where perhaps our ancestors walked, touching the soil, and looking out over the waterways that brought them to a new land, will be quite the experience.

In the meantime, I am dreaming of going to Sierra Leone. I wonder what grows in the gardens there? What an experience that will be…

Teri, Cottage in the Court

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Flower Petals – Cards of Positivity and Perspective

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Flower petals share their wisdom, if we take time to embrace their beauty.

Flower petals have been popping out in my world all year. Taking the time to enjoy them has been quite the task. I had to intentionally practice self-care at each and every opportunity.

I sought books to read for inner peace, curtailed my social media, and simply rested. Recovery after two years of unintentional pausing, writing books, and working fulltime was not an easy task. Realizing I needed to update The Cottage also became a reality. Working remotely allowed me to see every crack and wrinkle in my home. Upgrades were scheduled which would not allow me to embrace my back yard gardens. I had every intention of creating a micro-cut flower farm. Instead, the contractors waned me to remove plantings along the foundation. The thought of change in my garden was unsettling. In some ways more than the period of unintentional pausing. The search for inner peace as I accepted change was challenging.

As I looked out my window daily, mourning my garden was simply heartbreaking. Flower petals from the Camellias lay like confetti as the winter of 2022 ended. I eagerly awaited the Hellebore flowers on the side of my house. I knew I would have to move them for fear they would be in the way. The Hellebores are remnants of my father’s garden.

Knowing the brevity of Spring, everyday I checked for signs of flowers in my garden. From the early blooming crocus, phlox, to the daffodils, I patiently waited for the sequence of early Spring joy. Each flower petal meant more to me this year than ever before.

As many gardeners know, renovating the garden when you least expect it is a daunting task. The realization that change was destined to take place was difficult. Adulting is hard in many ways. Procrastinating made it difficult to endure, so I began to dig. I potted up all that I could as the flowers from the azaleas littered the ground to remind me that Spring was coming to an end.

Flower petals scattered from the Oso Easy roses allowed me to smile through my tears. Mourning change at The Cottage, the new windows did allow me to see the garden a tad clearer. Next up – the siding.

Older Cottage life is interesting. The Cottage is as seasoned as I am. Sometimes the floors creak, other times another sign of settling appears, yet life goes on. The siding was definitely showing it’s age. It became evident a simple paint job wasn’t going to cut it. I would have preferred to buy more flowers and plants – that was not in the cards for 2022.

To soothe my angst, I found Flower Petals: Blossoming guidance from the garden by Cheralyn Darcey on Etsy. These cards are the perfect small gift . The flower petals of thought are important even today. This period of unintentional change continues as the year draws to a close. The first card I flipped over was a picture of Violet sororia. The words were exactly what I needed to read:

The answers and truths are always within.

I chose to embrace these words and let my disappointment and angst go. Releasing is real and many times we can miss the gift, by holding onto what we cannot change. Since receiving these cards, I make time to pull a new one from the deck, just to keep me in a positive frame of mind.

Today’s card is a Tulip. The words read…

You are worth what it is you desire.

The box suggests using multiple cards sometimes or using them while enjoying aromatherapy. They are great for enhancing positive thoughts, which leads to a sense of well being.

It is October and the renovation is still in full swing. The garden is in a state of unintentional pausing. It is nesting season – yet again. I have this quiet time to look within and define exactly how I want my garden. I can prepare the soil with earthly goodness from local compost. Exploring what is new in the plant world and taking note of what might be Cottage worthy will make me smile. Watching the birds from my new office window, draped with a blanket over my feet, and Precious by my side is worth looking forward to.

As the world continues to move too fast, my daily practice will be simple. I will flip a card from Flower Petals: Blossoming guidance from the garden, as an act of self-care.

Does your garden provide optimism in less than perfect moments? What tools have you discovered during this period of uncertainty, that help re-center your spirit? Change – even when difficult – can be a good thing . It all depends on your perspective.

Flower petals as a part of the garden in our minds provide lingering thoughts of what has been. These flower petals helped me embrace change.

Sitting with Precious and watching the mailbox for catalogs. I wonder what tomorrow’s card will be.

Teri, Cottage in the Court

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The Harvest Moon – Lighting the Way for Angels

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The harvest moon shines brightly in the night sky. Signaling a call for new angels.

The harvest moon shone brightly the past few nights. Something told me that this was a sign, not just for the typical nighttime harvest, but a call for new angels in heaven. Heaven harvested angels from my family last week, right in time for the harvest moon. Our family is sad and we will miss them. Although sad, it is a time where I have chosen to reflect on the season of their lives. If you know anything about the harvest moon, you will understand the significance of the timing of their journey. As a woman connected to this earth, allow me to explain.

The harvest moon is something many people look forward to as a way of signaling a change in seasons. The bright light of this moon illuminates the fields from the heavens above. Traditionally, farmers are able to harvest the larger more visible crops, as they stand out in the well-lit field. Most farmers look forward to the harvest moon after toiling in the earth for a season. After a few nights of the harvest moon, the autumn equinox follows and a new season begins. Isn’t this just like the journey of life?

Heaven harvested fresh angels from my family last week. Having finished his earthly task, heaven chose Moses. It was time for him to embark upon a heavenly journey. Moses was a strong, wise, and seasoned man. He wrote a book about his life’s journey in an effort to inspire a new generation of individuals to be strong and not falter. Moses knew what it meant to have character and weather the storm – even in the face of adversity.

As an author, Moses wrote a book called, MOSES – A Sharecropper’s Son. Writing with the help of his granddaughter, Moses planted seeds for the next generation. It is via the words of this man we can read over and over again his perspectives on life. I can only imagine that at the end of his earthly journey, Moses heard that heaven was looking for new angels. Standing at the edge of life’s field, he waited for the harvest moon to illuminate the way.

I am certain that many others who had completed their earthly journey also waited at the edge of the field. My cousin George waited as well. Retiring a few years ago, George was beaming in May as we celebrated his son’s wedding. I still see him, standing across the room, catching my eye, as he pointed and grinned. Rapidly making his way across the room, glowing with joy, we hugged and chatted. Afterward, he made his rounds visiting family and friends who gathered for this joyous event. With that crooked smile, firm hug, and eyes glimmering as they held back tears of joy, George worked that room.

It reminded me of times spent with him as a child. George always made me laugh. As cousins, we gathered in the basement as his Mom, Aunt Alma, made us lunch of hot dogs and French fries. These moments are happy and cherished memories of our childhood. We looked forward to being together. George demonstrated what it meant to be a loving husband by taking care of his wife Felicia and being the best father imaginable.

Upon hearing that George was ill, prayers of healing went up. I imagine that George heard about the need for more angels in heaven and thought why not apply. George had the personality and knew he could fulfill the requirements. In my imagination, I see an image of George standing at the edge of a field. George stood waiting for the harvest moon to cast its glow for the journey ahead.

In my imagination, there were others waiting along the edge of the field. They patiently stood waiting for the next part of the journey. The light of the harvest moon would illuminate the way. Something tells me that along the way Moses and George would meet and become travel partners. With experiences from a well-lived life, Moses would be sharing the lessons learned along the way. George would simply smile that crooked smile and laugh.

Heaven harvested a few new angels last week. Two of them were Moses and George. I write this to honor them…

Teri, Cottage In The Court

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Life and The Seeds Sown Within

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Life is like a perennial garden. Often the seeds that are sown within enhance our very existence.

When I go into my garden, the realization of how plants imitate life is evident no matter where I look. The seeds which fall along the way and multiply, simply enhance what I consider my world. As I spoke with a friend recently, we were in agreement on a few observances in our life gardens.

Life is shorter than we ever thought, just like the seasons. We agreed, when we were younger, the seasons seemed to last forever. Now they whisk by with barely enough time to really enjoy the moments found within. Especially now. With the uncertainty of the next moment, the opportunity to just be in the moment is more important than ever.

Some people are like Mountain mint. A plant that attracts beneficial insects to the garden and repels a few that we do not want -such as mosquitos.

We spoke of the friends who we missed. Our friend Bob, who was like Pycnanthemum (Mountain Mint) in our world. You see, Bob had his hands in just about everything. Feeding knowledge to the younger folks who would listen and positive ideas to standard practices. He is a seed that we sorely miss, yet the roots he sunk deep into our workplace soil remain and grow.

There are friends who are like the seeds of the Cleome, scattering and making a difference to all who know them.
(Image by Anna Armbrust from Pixabay)

Mary was like the Spider Flower (Cleome). The seeds, which are quite minute, of this beautiful garden addition, truly speak to the nature of our friend. Although short in stature, Mary blooms eternally to many of us. If you are not familiar with the Cleome, this self-seeding annual brings life to the garden. It attracts hummingbirds and butterflies creating quite the show as they dance and hover above the blooms. Mary was always ready to dance, bringing joy to all who knew her.

I cannot forget the lesson of conversation. Yes, the art of simple conversation should be considered a seed as well. We reminisced about how we were raised. Sharing the joys of having a conversation with my Mom every day after school sowed the seed of how important human connections are – whether near or far. Mom chatted with each of us about our day and current events. We had the opportunity to respectfully speak our minds. I am certain that whatever we shared with her, were seeds as well. Our opinions helped Mom figure out how to fertilize each of us to help us grow. My sister, brothers, and I each had different requirements which helped us become the adults we are today. The seeds of conversation were enhanced each evening as we had family dinner together when Dad came home.

As seasons change, gardeners clean up the garden beds to prepare for the next season. We had to clean up from playing outside, so Dad could see his children happy and smelling quite fresh when he arrived home. At the dinner table, he sowed seeds of knowledge into our lives, whether we paid attention or not. At the time, we were hungry for whatever Mom cooked for dinner that day. We did not realize that Dad was sowing seeds of wisdom into our mental garden plots of life.

In these uncertain times, are we sowing seeds of positivity in the life gardens of these we encounter? It is important that we seize the moments we have to plant perennial or self-sowing seeds of positivity everywhere we go. The lingering effects of properly sown seeds can make a difference in the life gardens of those around us. Make time to have dinner with those you love to share memories with. Make your life a fertile bed that will grow seeds or roots of positivity to share with those around you.

If we take the time now to make sure we are sowing seeds that will linger along the way, the world will ultimately become a better place.

Off to be the seed in the life gardens of those that I love.

Teri, Cottage In The Court

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All Up In My Feelings – The Meditative Gardener

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All books on mediation or being mindful are simply not the same. Cheryl Wilfong has made this very clear by writing the book, The Meditative Gardener.

Of all the books on my shelf that I reached back to read, this book fit the moment. The Meditative Gardener – Cultivating Mindfulness of Body, Feelings and Mind is worth the re-read. Most books I review become part of my reference library or I find a fellow gardener to share it with. This is not one of those books to give away.

From time to time, there are words that suggest actions. These words tend to have me “all up in my feelings”. Cheryl has words that echo in my mind and cause me to reflect inwardly. Particularly because this year. I will not have the opportunity to #resetrenewrestore in my usual manner. My annual pleasure of choosing a faraway place, commit to seeing all of the gardens, and acting like a local has been revised. Cheryl Wilfong has helped me revise my mindset by immersing myself all in this book.

During this time of unintentional pausing, making tie to meditate allows me to feel ALL of my senses. It is mind blowing! Cheryl Wilfong is not just a Psychologist, but a Meditation Practitioner, and a Master Gardener, as well. Gardening is a great way to reduce and release stress. Meditating only enhances feelings of peace, as we consider how we garden.

Cheryl begins by using the Four Foundations of Mindfulness as the hardscaping for this book. The act of connecting us with our inner feelings as gardeners is important. Simple instructions provided by Cheryl asks the reader to choose one of the contemplations provided in the text. Readers can choose one daily, weekly or monthly. Choosing a contemplation enables the reader to practice mindfulness in the garden.

THE TOOKIT

There are two mental tools that Cheryl advises us to carry into the garden. Mindfulness of the body is number one. This tool allows us to touch on all of our senses as we garden.

Goodwill towards the garden, as well as the gardener, is the second tool. In short , this translates into gardening for joy. Cheryl reminds us to garden simply for the joy, not perfection or overabundance. Simply garden for the joy of being in the garden.

Whispering phrases of love and acceptance fertilizes our existence. Phrases like “May I feel safe”, May I feel happy” or “May I abide in well being ” all affect how we garden. By repeating phrases such as these, we harness the energy found in our minds. One of my favorite phrases is “May I feel safe”. I find myself repeating this important phrase daily.

THE ART OF MEDITATION

Cheryl suggests many options for meditating. As I read this book, an awareness came over me causing me to think of how I meditate. The innocent ways I engage with nature are a form of meditation. As a child growing up, I spent summers in the garden just laying amidst the flowers. I would stare up at the clouds and look through some of the petals on the blooms. Allowing my mind to wander, my extremities to feel the warmth of the sun, and my nose to capture all the scents wafting in through the air. I did not know at the time, I was practicing a meditative mindset in the garden.

Meditation in the garden should be an easy practice. I often wonder if my parents knew this as they taught us how to garden? From selection, sowing, watering to nurturing a simple seed. We were encouraged to be optimistic, to care and to give. The garden is the natural place to learn, reflect and of course…meditate. There are many different ways to meditate in the garden.

It is hard for me to actually say what the best part of the book is after reading it. The entire book was informative. All of the meditations can be applied to our daily life. One chapter that I really spent time on was THE ROOTS OF STRESS: Greed, Aversion, and Delusion. I found this chapter to be enlightening, informative and insightful on many different levels.

There are many topics covered in the MIND -Mind and Body Contemplation segment of this book. Cheryl followed up with a chapter called CONTEMPLATIONS. This chapter allowed the reader to investigate things like aging, change, even karma.

A particular exercise that melted my heart was called A Bouquet of Joy. The reader was advised to pick flowers from the garden. Utilizing all the senses, the reader should not look at what is missing in the bouquet. Explore how the bouquet makes you feel inside. It is suggested that the reader share the bouquet.

This book is a must read, in my opinion, for those who garden for the pleasure of gardening. The enlightenment of the mind and senses is a bonus.

Meditating in the garden should encompass all the senses…

Today I meditate, reflect and embrace the beauty that surrounds me…in my garden. Do you meditate in your garden?

Teri, Cottage In the Court

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